~A dissonance must always resolve itself~
Facade. A mask that you hide behind. A sense of invulnerability that you can choose to keep. A false sense of security in times of indecision. A place of fake shelter in a thunder storm, your front is perfect, but the inner is fried. You begin to leak out. The facade is being worn. Confusion circles around, the real you trying to slow while the facade tries to hold strong. You can win over. The matter is letting yourself, or not. If tears come, let yourself cry. If a smile sees the world, be as happy as the life around you makes the smile become. Let anger subside and be dealt with. What is right is right. Don't over question what is right. Nothing may seem worth it now or in the past, but the future is and end you cannot see until it dawns. Why waste precious time questioning, doubting, over thinking. Mistakes happen in life. A lot of the time, mistakes suck. Sometimes you feel like an imbecile, incompetent and, or, a failure. This is already mind boggling, then here comes a person of whom has a facade that fits to their face quite comfortably still, who thinks they need to tell you how much of a failure you are, every time they see you. When will it all stop?!
A guilty conscious. What will that do but drive you insane?! Is insanity the part of pure existence that everyone must face to move on to the next phase for their journey in life? How long must it last? Is it the reason why the only way to have peace is in the utter cold? Asleep so deep that nothing but your own burning flesh can wake you? Must I burn? Is rock bottom a place where you want to die? Is there a limit to how many times you can hit it before you actually die of exhaustion from hitting it with all that you have left so often? How long does it take for you to thirst for something better? When does the growling satisfy? When will the lies seize?! Is there a safe place to hide from all of this? A place to stop thinking, stop pondering, stop holding my mask in place? I want a place where I can be free! I've relied on myself for far too long, and I'm only 16! Is this what its supposed to be like at 16? Why am I so exhausted? When do I get my day off? Why is this road so windy? I keep getting thrown off course. Why is it that I still haven't figured all this out? How is it I am never 100%? I always seem to be just a little bit off, 98.9% there. I sometimes know what to do, but I just can't seem to do it. Help me figure this out. Please.
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